Oh, Boo-Hoo
This article contains the complaints of a woman who had had complaints made against her for posturing that the choice of women to stay at home with their children is a mistake. The woman is cuckoo, arrogant, and completely deluded by her own self-importance. She even admits that she was looking for a book deal, meaning that she's really only out to make a buck by incensing lots of poeple. If you read the orginal article, which is linked in the complaint-article, and you read her "rules", I think you will be completely flabbergasted by what she has to say about what women need to do in order to succeed in the workplace, such as find poorer or lower-class husbands so that women will feel more inclined to be the breadwinner.
It's articles like these that really irk me. It is, indeed, a choice that women are given, to either stay at home or to continue full-time in their careers. That is the beauty of our modern society; we have the resources and the capacity to accomodate what women want to do with their lives. In my mind, it is a sad state of affairs when, from a financial perspective, there isn't the choice to stay at home, even part-tme, because of the cost of living in many areas of the country. For those of us lucky enough to have the option of raising our children ourselves, rather than turning them over to someone we hardly know (and probably wouldn't have the time to get to know anyway because of the demands ofa full-time work schedule), I think I can safely say that we feel it is an extremely rewarding and challenging path to have chosen.
It is ignorant of the author to claim that it doesn't take any great intellect to be a mother and housewife. I firmly believe that whatever education we bring to the table in a relationship and motherhood actually benefits our marriage and our parenting skills, even if we decide not to use those skills in the workplace. Because of our education, our children will have fuller and richer childhoods (Jonah, at a little over one year old, already has a love of books that is remarkable), and it allows our spouses to have a meaningful conversation with someone at the end of the day. We also bring a lot to other people in our lives. As a tax accountant, I can give advice and do research for family and friends that they would ordinarlily have had to either research laboriously on their own or pay an arm and a leg to get soemone else to do it. I may be only a part-timer, but my education and job experiences are not going to waste.
And I turly have to womder how herdaughters truly feel about their mother's opinions. I wonder if they really support her theories, or if they've really considered what their mother is saying to them, that they weren't important or worthy or stimulating enough for their mother to give them her full attention and care. How would a child feel if told this by their parent, the one who is supposed to love them and cherish them like nobody else can?
The other article, Everybody Hates Linda, which also has a link off the complaint-article, is actually pretty good. It essentially says that there is no right or wrong decision when it comes to either staying home or not. Each person has to make whatever decision is right for them and their family. Each situation is unique and deserves the respect due a decison that is usually not made lightly or without some real consideration of the costs and benefits associated with it.
Gee, is it obvious that I have no sympathy for this woman? As far as I'm concerned, she deserves all the backlash that she has received.
It's articles like these that really irk me. It is, indeed, a choice that women are given, to either stay at home or to continue full-time in their careers. That is the beauty of our modern society; we have the resources and the capacity to accomodate what women want to do with their lives. In my mind, it is a sad state of affairs when, from a financial perspective, there isn't the choice to stay at home, even part-tme, because of the cost of living in many areas of the country. For those of us lucky enough to have the option of raising our children ourselves, rather than turning them over to someone we hardly know (and probably wouldn't have the time to get to know anyway because of the demands ofa full-time work schedule), I think I can safely say that we feel it is an extremely rewarding and challenging path to have chosen.
It is ignorant of the author to claim that it doesn't take any great intellect to be a mother and housewife. I firmly believe that whatever education we bring to the table in a relationship and motherhood actually benefits our marriage and our parenting skills, even if we decide not to use those skills in the workplace. Because of our education, our children will have fuller and richer childhoods (Jonah, at a little over one year old, already has a love of books that is remarkable), and it allows our spouses to have a meaningful conversation with someone at the end of the day. We also bring a lot to other people in our lives. As a tax accountant, I can give advice and do research for family and friends that they would ordinarlily have had to either research laboriously on their own or pay an arm and a leg to get soemone else to do it. I may be only a part-timer, but my education and job experiences are not going to waste.
And I turly have to womder how herdaughters truly feel about their mother's opinions. I wonder if they really support her theories, or if they've really considered what their mother is saying to them, that they weren't important or worthy or stimulating enough for their mother to give them her full attention and care. How would a child feel if told this by their parent, the one who is supposed to love them and cherish them like nobody else can?
The other article, Everybody Hates Linda, which also has a link off the complaint-article, is actually pretty good. It essentially says that there is no right or wrong decision when it comes to either staying home or not. Each person has to make whatever decision is right for them and their family. Each situation is unique and deserves the respect due a decison that is usually not made lightly or without some real consideration of the costs and benefits associated with it.
Gee, is it obvious that I have no sympathy for this woman? As far as I'm concerned, she deserves all the backlash that she has received.
posted by Cathy at 8:12 PM
3 Comments:
Very well put, Cathy!
Ditto!
And this,
"Each person has to make whatever decision is right for them and their family. Each situation is unique and deserves the respect due a decison that is usually not made lightly or without some real consideration of the costs and benefits associated with it."
can be applied to many decisions in my life these days! Thanks for putting my thoughts into words! :)
I'll be happy when someday the work/at home issue is not either/or. Instead of lambasting women who stay at home, how about lobbying to make it easier for women OR men to return to work after a short hiatus to take care of their small children? More part time or flexible schedules? Day cares on site? Some of us would like to work, but the sacrifice of not spending these precious years with our tiny charges makes other sacrifices seem more palatable. And many women who "stay" at work are not enjoying the intellectual and financial windfalls this elitist author seems to believe they'll get. Last time I checked, the factory workers on my husband's side of the family who returned to work were doing so at hourly jobs in order to make the mortgage, not storm the corner office. This woman's research protocol (calling couples whose marriages were announced in the NY Times, for pity's sake) announces her own classist bias. Thank God she's retired from her job. Now move over and let the rest of us play, you toxic harpy.
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